I had the chance to clean this article up quite a bit. May Jesus pull all of us closer to him.
I’ve never been married. But I have been very interested in marriage.
The divorce of my parents led me to one of the most fervent prayers I’ve ever made – “God, don’t let me end up there.” It’s the kind of prayer God is eager to answer. His first lesson? Much of the answer takes place before any vows do.
And the greatest answer of all is…Jesus.
I know. I can hear you sigh. You’ve heard for years that you need Jesus more than a spouse. But he just seems so boring compared to romance and white picket fences and sex and babies. He honestly seems unrelated, other than saying “no” to your longing.
But indulge me for a second. The fall of my family prompted me to keep my eyes and ears open for “what it takes” for a thriving marriage. It got me watching older couples, gleaning from them, reading every…
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Excellent article, Brandon. It is hard on the single side of things to see how God is so much more fulfilling than a spouse. I used to think, “easy for those married people to say! They’re not dealing with loneliness and desire.” The truth is, good marriage is HARD. It takes work to bury that record of wrongs. It takes work to keep loving someone when the ground falls out from under you. I tell my kids all the time, “Don’t get married to just anybody. Get married to someone who puts God first!” I even tell them it’s better to stay single than to be in a bad marriage. Put God first and let the other come in His timing.
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Agree with all of that!
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This post reached me on so many levels. Thank you for writing it. I have a few drafts on what God has taught me about my desire for marriage. I can relate to your last point so much. I’ve had that exact same thought “everything will be better when I’m married”. What a gracious God we have to turn our faces to Him because He knows that only He can love us and satisfy us to the fullest.
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So dangerous to believe otherwise.
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The “God-shaped hole” is probably too passe by now, but it is true. In fact, not just a God-shaped hole (like it’s just a portion)–but our entire being should be filled by Him and his Holy Spirit. The Lord bless you, Brandon.
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Never passe.
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Wow, amazing post. Thanks for sharing.
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Thanks, Laura. 🙂
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